Falling in Love…with a Cult

I’ve spoken on this channel about how cults recruit new members, but there is an aspect of this I have not discussed before which I think might shed some light on not only how smart people can fall for stupid things, but how almost anyone is susceptible to cult recruitment. Why? Because falling for a cult is a lot like falling in love.

Physiologically, I think our brain responds to cult recruitment the same way we respond to a new love interest. Despite what many of us think, our feelings and emotions are what drives our thinking. It’s been theorized that our entire thinking process evolved just to rationalize our feelings, rather than the other way around. But regardless of where our feelings and emotions come from, it is an empirical fact that we are predominantly emotional creatures and we let our emotions guide our decisions. We think, and are often told by movies and salesmen and advertisements, that if it “feels good” or “feels right” than it is right and we should just go with it.

So what happens when we fall in love? Well, a lot of things. Here’s a breakdown from a Psychology Today article by Maryanne Fisher, an associate professor of psychology at Saint Mary’s University in Canada:

“To start with, dopamine, which is created in the brain and adrenal glands, enhances the release of testosterone. Dopamine affects various organs, including the genitals, the sweat glands, and also the senses. Have you ever noticed that when you are in the early stages of lust or love, you sweat more? Or that the sky seems bluer? Dopamine, in this context of arousal, is partly responsibly. As a consequence of dopamine being released, mood and emotions are also influenced, leading to feelings of excitement and happiness. Meanwhile, testosterone increases sexual desire, but also increases aggressive behaviour and behaviourally, may push someone to pursue the one who is fueling this intense response.

“After this step, the neurotransmitters norepinephrine and PEA (phenylethylamine) lead to focused attention. Individuals start to ‘zero-in’ on the person they desire, and at the same time, often have a feeling of euphoria. Norepinephrine is a stimulant, so it also causes individuals to feel alert, potentially unable to sleep, and enables them to notice and remember even the smallest of details about their partners. PEA is responsible for the feelings of giddiness, and may cause the loss of appetite. If the relationship doesn’t last, PEA levels fall and are partly responsible for the feelings of depression that can be experienced.

“A feedback loop begins to form, with a brain reward system becoming involved. This reward system is influenced by the central nervous system and the contents of the bloodstream, such as the level of various neurotransmitters. The reward system sends chemical messages, via neurotransmitters, to various parts of the body, including the stomach, skin, genitals and other organs, which causes them to send messages back to the brain. To phrase it simplistically, if stimulation of the genitals feels good, for example, then the reward system receives this information and causes one to seek more of what was pleasurable. Interestingly, anticipation alone can cause a biological response and stimulate the reward system.”

Now I wouldn’t say that sexual arousal is always part of the cult recruitment process, but there are a few factors here that suggest there are definite parallels between what I just described and what happens to someone in their cult recruitment phase. Sex has been used to get people into cults, but usually it’s not that blatant. However, almost every cult does engage in the technique of love bombing, and that is done to try to create the dopamine and neurotransmitter rushes I just described.

Love bombing is when cult members are overly complimentary, exaggeratedly telling the recruit how smart or great they are, or how they must have shown up at the cult’s doorstep because they are on the same wavelength as the cult members or how they are deeply spiritual or enlightened, so of course they have found the group they really belong to. This pumps up the person’s self-esteem since almost everyone really does want to be liked and admired and this newfound affinity with the cult group gives them a sense of connection and belonging.

In many cases, there is also the fact that a person is seeking a cult’s help because they are not getting the love or attention they need from their own spouse or family. The cult becomes their surrogate family and the cult leader becomes their new parental figure. This is very common, especially in smaller cults where there is a direct connection between the cult leader and their followers.

And of course, people are drawn to cults because we are social creatures who are tuned by evolution to want to get along with others and be part of groups or at least gain the approval of others. This brings into play a whole array of social mechanisms which cults use to pressure a person into joining, such as the idea the group will protect them, peer pressure to join, isolation from outside influences and induced dependency, where the recruit is made to think that if he doesn’t join, he will not only be making the worst mistake of his life but will actually be doomed to failure in any endeavor they try without the cult’s help.

If a person can fall in love, they can fall for a cult. They just need to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and be just vulnerable enough to put their trust in a friendly stranger who seems to have nothing but their best interests at heart. Normally there wouldn’t be anything wrong with this, but cults amp everything up to 11. That’s why they are so great to start but so disastrous in the long run. If you ever find yourself in a situation where you are being love bombed or are starting to feel like this new group of strangers you’ve never met before understand you better than your closest friends, it’s time to take a step back and rationally look at what’s going on. Let the love bombing wear off and make sure dopamine is not driving your thinking and you’ll have a lot less mistakes you’ll regret in your life. Just sayin’.

Thank you for watching.